A Broken Heart, A Broken Summer: Waiting for Bill from Kathmandu to Oklahoma

From event-filled England we traveled across the ocean to Norman, Oklahoma on July 27th, 1976, arriving on the 28th. We were met by Bill’s parents who were there at SIL helping process new candidates (Bill's Dad, Otis, was the candidate secretary for Wycliffe at that time). His mom was great with the kids and we were surrounded by loving Wycliffe people. We stayed in the dorms there for the next couple weeks, til they closed down. I knew that many were praying for us. Still I felt pretty exposed and vulnerable during those weeks, and alone without Bill, but grateful for praying people, and always aware of His faithfulness.

Note: We had no contact with Bill for over three and a half weeks from the time we left Nepal, until we got a call about his imminent arrival. No letters, calls, or any form of communication. Remember, this was in the Dark Ages before the Internet, so no Skype or Facebook or email; and international calls were not only iffy but the expense was prohibitive.

July 29 from Norman, Oklahoma: “Hurting so bad this morning. My thots are in tears. I don’t understand the tears, or much of anything. I do KNOW a deep sure peace in my heart, directly from Him who keeps my heart and mind: all mixed with pain, burdens and love. In numbness, Lord, I come to you for blessing and encouragement and whatever….What a privilege to be numb with grief, yet abounding with joy.

Here the Lord said to me: “My words are sweet, child, as honeycomb. Eat them and live. They will be your nourishment. They will be your source of strength and growth and youth. Dwell in Me as I dwell in you and I will make our hearts rejoice together: sorrow turned to joy. I know your pain. I’ve known pain so great I sweat drops of blood—the pain of separation. Yes, child, I know it hurts. Take heart that it’s part of MY pruning and prelude to full resurrection, joy unbounded and oneness with the Father to do His will."

July 30: “So tired. Dreaming of being in the village….a large river coming….waves are hitting now, and drenching me, but not pulling down. Cover me, Lord.”

August 1: “A good talk with Dow, open sharing of what happened and the grief of heart. The Friday night meeting was good. Dow prayed for release and I found myself uncontrollably sobbing in front of everyone, but also found release and healing and a new beginning. It’s His work and I will trust Him…..Saturday Dad and mom left. They are simply beautiful people.”

August 4: Ken Pike spoke in chapel about “the people from Nepal who are hurting” – to believe His creativity and plan in this all—a new beginning—not just a good ending. While he was talking the Lord showed me more of His pain in Gethsemane—knowing He was leaving His disciples and leaving them without power. He was just beginning to see His love working out in them—and then they are cut off. And so it is with our life. I can see it for the Tharus. It naturally seems we should stay. But it is God working and He always brings life from death.

August 6: I took Jon and Jenny to a park yesterday morning. Jon fell from a slide and lost his breath and turned white and then cried and cried. I again committed him to the Lord and he was fine. We’re not avoiding accidents but god is healing us all up. Tis mercy all, immense and free.

But I’m missing Bill so much—longing for the hour of his return. Activities at SIL have slowed down—everything but Jon and Jenny, these 2 precious gifts. We all need Daddy, our head in Christ.

August 9: Still no Bill, but it’s good to be here in Jim and Penny’s lovely home. Jon and Jenny seem more settled here than in the dorms. I woke up praying this morning, giving Him the concern of my heart for Bill. Really thought he’d be here by now.
The kids have settled down here. They’ve really enjoyed being on this “farm” with goats, chickens, rabbits, dogs, cats, and this morning had a horse ride and played with a calf. Great Fun!

The church in Norman gave us $300—a real surprise and gift of love. Overwhelming—all their love has been, His lovely body. He is glorified there.

August 12: Still no Bill or letter and some wild dreams. Jenny dreamed that she and daddy were in 2 rocket ships and Daddy’s crashed (and he died) and hers didn’t. Ethan did this picture and said there was a meteor crashing into Daddy's rocket. J is for Jenny's and D is for Daddy's rocket.

I dreamed that Bill and Dave Watters were fighting deadly snakes. Jon dreamed he and I were being captured by pirates. I think the enemy’s trying to discourage in so many ways.

I keep needing to re-commit my thots, especially when I wake in the middle of the night and start churning the possibilities of Bill’s whereabouts. It’s like I’m not married anymore. But I just trust the Lord to work His work in us at this time. I have a tremendous burden in praying for all those still there in Nepal working. His work is building the kingdom. The Lord said, “All this is good preparation for what is to come. If you can’t trust Me now, you won’t be able to later. Relax and put your hand in Mine and I will act.”

August 16: That day a phone call and the next day Bill arrived! We’re all rejoicing to be together again. The airlines lost his suitcase, but the rest of his trip was OK. We’ve just been relaxing, eating, sleeping, reading, and being thankful. God is so good, hallelujah.

[From an August 14 letter to Bill’s parents, from me] We expect to arrive in California around the 30th and would like to stay with you a day or two while we try to find a house to rent-- a 2 bedroom house in Santa Ana. Jon’s been accepted for 1st grade at Calvary’s church school and Bill wants to settle in the area for sure.

[Later that day from Bill] Hi ! My turn. It’s good to be back and will be even nicer to see you. Just to clarify the housing situation: what we’re looking for is a 2 bedroom house with a yard. But mainly right now we want to know what might be available. We’d like a place with a bit of a yard for the kids’ sake. We’re planning to arrive in Santa Ana on about the 30th or 31st depending on exact schedule and carrier. Will let you know more definitely later. Well, we’re looking forward very much to seeing you all. Love, Bill & Dotty.

At last we were all together in one place….on our way to California and then what? Bill Gothard talks about Death To A Vision. This certainly was our first one. Our whole world was just turned upside down and we didn’t know what it would look like when it turned right side up, just that He would be there, holding us, and keeping us in the center of His love-care and provision.

Below is a copy of our letter to friends and supporters after this eventful change in our lives.

 

The concluding picture is six year old Joshua's drawing of Bill returning on the plane and us welcoming him with open arms. He said my feet aren't touching the ground because I was jumping up and down I was so excited to see him!